Well, it was my last night in Toronto.
I spent the day packing up and cleaning up.
I went grocery shopping, and bought a rasperry tart at the local bakery (apatly named, Queen of Tarts).
I made my roommates a fantastic dinner, we all enjoyed it, and then enjoyed the tart.
It was fantastic to get to hang out with my friends, and 10 days in Toronto was good for my soul. Thanks to my friends, here and everywhere else.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Monday, December 10, 2007
Dinner for One
I went to dinner alone tonight, and it was fabulous.
I spent all day with my friend, got a new sweatshirt at one of my fav. Canadian stores, and then we picked up her boyfriend/my friend from work and made our way back to the house. Just as we were approaching the grocery store they started a couple fight and being the third wheel was about to be uncomfortable. I excused myself, went back to the house to check my email (no word yet on that job), change into my new hoodie, grab some money and my new book.
From there, I left the house to go have dinner by myself. One of my roommates was all "By yourself though? I mean, don't go by yourself. If you need company, I could always go." But I stood by ground, and it is for this reason:
Going to a meal, with just myself and a book, is one of my favorite things to do. I went, I had dinner, I read my book, and I felt rejuvenated. I had dinner by myself and I was able to come home and socialize with my 3 favorite guys/roommates for two hours.
Me, a good book, a good meal. Another "life lesson" relearned in Toronto.
I spent all day with my friend, got a new sweatshirt at one of my fav. Canadian stores, and then we picked up her boyfriend/my friend from work and made our way back to the house. Just as we were approaching the grocery store they started a couple fight and being the third wheel was about to be uncomfortable. I excused myself, went back to the house to check my email (no word yet on that job), change into my new hoodie, grab some money and my new book.
From there, I left the house to go have dinner by myself. One of my roommates was all "By yourself though? I mean, don't go by yourself. If you need company, I could always go." But I stood by ground, and it is for this reason:
Going to a meal, with just myself and a book, is one of my favorite things to do. I went, I had dinner, I read my book, and I felt rejuvenated. I had dinner by myself and I was able to come home and socialize with my 3 favorite guys/roommates for two hours.
Me, a good book, a good meal. Another "life lesson" relearned in Toronto.
Sunday, December 9, 2007
"The Adventure" continues...kind of
So those interviews? They went all fine and everything, and one of them even panned out to potential employment. But, there's a "but".
I've been here over a week. In that week, I made contact/saw almost 3 apartments and had 5 interviews set up for nanny jobs. You can't argue that I'm not ambitious, or that I haven't tried. I did try. And in the end, I just didn't feel comfortable here at all.
In the past month, there has be a lot of uncomfortable things in my life - leaving my job, packing everything I own, getting on a bus for a new life, and trying to live in a foreign city. Being uncomfortable is vital to growth in life, I understand that. We can't always be comfortable. But I was at least calm and accepting of all that uncertainty and lack of comfort in leaving my job, packing, getting on the bus. But the uneasiness I feel in being an illegal alien, is not something I am willing to put up with.
There was this voice in the back of my head the whole time that just kept saying "I could be doing this in a city in the states, and doing it LEGALLY." And I don't really want to be nanny. I don't want to raise someone else kid. If I'm going to be looking for a job, I want to be looking for a job that I'm qualified for. And I can't do that in Canada.
To be true to the whole experience, I can't deny that I feel I failed somehow. That by leaving, I'm admitting defeat or something. I understand that this is not the case, but I can't deny that it FEELS that way.
Still, I learned a lot:
I needed to leave Michigan. And I probably wouldn't have done that just
to move back home. I needed this to motivate me to leave. (Thanks Katy,
that was a good insight).
* I now know my comfort limits with adventure: moving, not a huge risk for me. Unemployment - HUGE risk for me.
* I am a good roommate. And I would like my roommates to also be good roommates.
* I like to run in winter in parks, and I should do it more often.
* I am uncomfortable being an illegal alien.
There are countless other life lessons, but this blog is already pretty long,
so I'm gonna wrap it up now. But I'll say this final thing: There's a job opening at a school back in Chicago, I put in my application. I think it would be a great fit for me, and for the school - say a little prayer that the school thinks so too!
I've been here over a week. In that week, I made contact/saw almost 3 apartments and had 5 interviews set up for nanny jobs. You can't argue that I'm not ambitious, or that I haven't tried. I did try. And in the end, I just didn't feel comfortable here at all.
In the past month, there has be a lot of uncomfortable things in my life - leaving my job, packing everything I own, getting on a bus for a new life, and trying to live in a foreign city. Being uncomfortable is vital to growth in life, I understand that. We can't always be comfortable. But I was at least calm and accepting of all that uncertainty and lack of comfort in leaving my job, packing, getting on the bus. But the uneasiness I feel in being an illegal alien, is not something I am willing to put up with.
There was this voice in the back of my head the whole time that just kept saying "I could be doing this in a city in the states, and doing it LEGALLY." And I don't really want to be nanny. I don't want to raise someone else kid. If I'm going to be looking for a job, I want to be looking for a job that I'm qualified for. And I can't do that in Canada.
To be true to the whole experience, I can't deny that I feel I failed somehow. That by leaving, I'm admitting defeat or something. I understand that this is not the case, but I can't deny that it FEELS that way.
Still, I learned a lot:
I needed to leave Michigan. And I probably wouldn't have done that just
to move back home. I needed this to motivate me to leave. (Thanks Katy,
that was a good insight).
* I now know my comfort limits with adventure: moving, not a huge risk for me. Unemployment - HUGE risk for me.
* I am a good roommate. And I would like my roommates to also be good roommates.
* I like to run in winter in parks, and I should do it more often.
* I am uncomfortable being an illegal alien.
There are countless other life lessons, but this blog is already pretty long,
so I'm gonna wrap it up now. But I'll say this final thing: There's a job opening at a school back in Chicago, I put in my application. I think it would be a great fit for me, and for the school - say a little prayer that the school thinks so too!
Thursday, December 6, 2007
Update on "The Adventure"
!st: A shout out to my brother, whose celebrating his 22nd birthday today. Happy Birthday Little Bro!
2nd: An update on that whole "moving to another city/country, starting completely from scratch thing":
*Living arrangements are stressful. It's a decent sized apartment with
4 people in it and a dynamic between them that's already established
(with it's ups and it's downs) for over a year now. Adding another
person to that, has been,...stressful. That's the best word I can come
up with. Not sure what will happen from here. There's a lot of flux
going on, some roommates thinking of leaving, me thinking of staying,
but not sure if it's the best thing. But the rent would be cheap, the
location is good,.... I digress. Anyways...
Side note though: I did
look at one place with two rooms for rent (another friend is coming to
town, so I'm doing a little looking around for the both of us). It was
nice, clean, private. Mostly it's significance is that it was the first
destination I had in Toronto where I had to get somewhere that I had
never been, on my own. It was a total success and upped my confidence.
* Jobs: I've pretty much lived on craigslist
this week, what in also looking for a possible place to live as well as
employment. I should also have looked in the local paper, but, since
I've had some success withcraigslist , I stuck with that. I emailed
every job that looked good to me: small children (under the age of 5),
full time, preferably near my current residence but that's not vital,
and seeminglylegit . (So many jobs with just "Nanny needed. One child.
Call this number." I mean, if that's not a potential killer, I don't
know what is).
And one week after I arrived, it's panned out
pretty well. (Although, let's see if I actually get offered any jobs
tomorrow). I have four interviews this weekend, one seems perfect, I
just hope it pays enough. Another seems really good, and the other two
seem like they would pay fairly well, but would be more work than are
worth it. Like, I might be the nanny who got hosed if I took these
jobs. But what can I say, I'm unemployed, I'll at least take the
interview.
I'll update tomorrow on how things go (3 of the
interviews are tomorrow), but let me end with these things I've learned
in a week of starting over:
*Unemployment does not suit me. I don't
even know what to do with myself. I go crazy, I get stuck in thought
with nothing else to distract me. It'shorrible.
* I know it's all high and mighty and what not to live with out a tv, but I hate it. Again, I think it has to be with me being an overly analytical person. If I don't have something around to distract me, like Project Runway or Heroes or even stupid Extreme Home Make-over per say, I get all caught up in my head and just go round and round up there. It ain't pretty.
* I really do prefer running in the winter as to the summer. I know, I
think I'm crazy too. It's cold to start out, but once the blood gets
going, and you warm yourself up by your own running, it's just exhilarating. I love it.
Long post, good for you for making it to the end. I'll try to keep up the documentation of the adventure tomorrow. Hopefully, with good news to report!
2nd: An update on that whole "moving to another city/country, starting completely from scratch thing":
*Living arrangements are stressful. It's a decent sized apartment with
4 people in it and a dynamic between them that's already established
(with it's ups and it's downs) for over a year now. Adding another
person to that, has been,...stressful. That's the best word I can come
up with. Not sure what will happen from here. There's a lot of flux
going on, some roommates thinking of leaving, me thinking of staying,
but not sure if it's the best thing. But the rent would be cheap, the
location is good,.... I digress. Anyways...
Side note though: I did
look at one place with two rooms for rent (another friend is coming to
town, so I'm doing a little looking around for the both of us). It was
nice, clean, private. Mostly it's significance is that it was the first
destination I had in Toronto where I had to get somewhere that I had
never been, on my own. It was a total success and upped my confidence.
* Jobs: I've pretty much lived on craigslist
this week, what in also looking for a possible place to live as well as
employment. I should also have looked in the local paper, but, since
I've had some success withcraigslist , I stuck with that. I emailed
every job that looked good to me: small children (under the age of 5),
full time, preferably near my current residence but that's not vital,
and seeminglylegit . (So many jobs with just "Nanny needed. One child.
Call this number." I mean, if that's not a potential killer, I don't
know what is).
And one week after I arrived, it's panned out
pretty well. (Although, let's see if I actually get offered any jobs
tomorrow). I have four interviews this weekend, one seems perfect, I
just hope it pays enough. Another seems really good, and the other two
seem like they would pay fairly well, but would be more work than are
worth it. Like, I might be the nanny who got hosed if I took these
jobs. But what can I say, I'm unemployed, I'll at least take the
interview.
I'll update tomorrow on how things go (3 of the
interviews are tomorrow), but let me end with these things I've learned
in a week of starting over:
*Unemployment does not suit me. I don't
even know what to do with myself. I go crazy, I get stuck in thought
with nothing else to distract me. It'shorrible.
* I know it's all high and mighty and what not to live with out a tv, but I hate it. Again, I think it has to be with me being an overly analytical person. If I don't have something around to distract me, like Project Runway or Heroes or even stupid Extreme Home Make-over per say, I get all caught up in my head and just go round and round up there. It ain't pretty.
* I really do prefer running in the winter as to the summer. I know, I
think I'm crazy too. It's cold to start out, but once the blood gets
going, and you warm yourself up by your own running, it's just exhilarating. I love it.
Long post, good for you for making it to the end. I'll try to keep up the documentation of the adventure tomorrow. Hopefully, with good news to report!
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
A Run in The Park
A scene from yesterday:
In the last hour of sun-light I changed into my running clothes, got out my ipod, and put my roommate's dog, Mia, on the leash. We walked about 3 blocks to the nearest (and biggest in Toronto) park. From there, we started to run. I've been to the park about twice in my life, so I obviously don't know it very well yet. Mia probably knows it better than I do. It is a huge park, one river boarding it, another river/creek running through it, multiple roads, even more paved pathes, and even more than that foot pathes.
Since I don't know it very well, I was mostly sticking to paths with roads along side. Mia and I were about twenty minutes into our run when I could smell animals. You know, that general smell of farm. Which is odd, cuz we were in the middle of the park. But there were fences up creating plots of land that seemed to be abandoned. I figured it was left over from the summer when maybe they brought animals in.
We keep running and Mia stops to pee on the fences, and then seems interested in something beyond the fence. It was getting so dark I almost didn't see it all, but there in the middle of Toronto, was a black Oxyen.
The path ends there so Mia and I cross the street to other path, and as I look up I see two huge black American Bison. As we continue to run, next to the Bison are antelope, and from there goats. Mia really wanted to chase down the antelope and goats, but instead we let them be, and simply marveled at the greatness of the animals.
Who says you can't find nature and wonder in the city.
In the last hour of sun-light I changed into my running clothes, got out my ipod, and put my roommate's dog, Mia, on the leash. We walked about 3 blocks to the nearest (and biggest in Toronto) park. From there, we started to run. I've been to the park about twice in my life, so I obviously don't know it very well yet. Mia probably knows it better than I do. It is a huge park, one river boarding it, another river/creek running through it, multiple roads, even more paved pathes, and even more than that foot pathes.
Since I don't know it very well, I was mostly sticking to paths with roads along side. Mia and I were about twenty minutes into our run when I could smell animals. You know, that general smell of farm. Which is odd, cuz we were in the middle of the park. But there were fences up creating plots of land that seemed to be abandoned. I figured it was left over from the summer when maybe they brought animals in.
We keep running and Mia stops to pee on the fences, and then seems interested in something beyond the fence. It was getting so dark I almost didn't see it all, but there in the middle of Toronto, was a black Oxyen.
The path ends there so Mia and I cross the street to other path, and as I look up I see two huge black American Bison. As we continue to run, next to the Bison are antelope, and from there goats. Mia really wanted to chase down the antelope and goats, but instead we let them be, and simply marveled at the greatness of the animals.
Who says you can't find nature and wonder in the city.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
A Great Day In Toronto
This morning I had a phone interview for a job that lead to a face to face interview that will happen on Friday. I ran some errands and got to know my neighborhood better. I got to spend time with my roommate/friend. Another friend stopped by to say hi and now she and I are going for a run. We've called another friend and we're thinking about getting together for dinner. Jobs, friends, running - I already love living in the city again, in Toronto.
Traveling & More Traveling
Here's some thoughts I wrote 3 days ago as I was traveling by bus up North:
Traveling
It’s noon. It is noon on a hot greyhound bus. It’s noon on a hot greyhound bus going into the 6th hour of this journey and it’s about 4 more hours till the layover in Detroit. I can only pray that my ipod can suck off enough energy off my computer before my computer dies.
More Traveling
5:56 pm – In the 13th hour now of travel. It’s been a bit of a nail bitter. The bus was 35 minutes late getting into Detroit, which was scary because my lay-over was only supposed to be 5o minutes. Luckily, my next bus was 15 minutes late for it’s scheduled departure. In the end I had just enough time to charge my laptop up to 46% (and I’m down back to 7% right now, but that’s cuz I’ve had my ipod charging this whole 2nd half) and to grab a bag of chips out of the vending machine. Sweet. Gotta love traveling by bus.
Even better, and this is truly a great thing, is that this was by far my easiest border crossing EVER. And I’ve been back and forth more than a few. They hardly even looked at my passport, just “How long are you going to be visiting” and I was back on the bus.
Even better than that, if it can be true, is that one of the women whom I answered a Nanning ad for called literally as the bus was pulling out of the Detroit station and we were approaching the Canadian border. A good omen. Maybe I’ll be employed soon!
I’m down to 3%, and only approx. 5 more hours to go! Hope my ipod can last that long….
Traveling
It’s noon. It is noon on a hot greyhound bus. It’s noon on a hot greyhound bus going into the 6th hour of this journey and it’s about 4 more hours till the layover in Detroit. I can only pray that my ipod can suck off enough energy off my computer before my computer dies.
More Traveling
5:56 pm – In the 13th hour now of travel. It’s been a bit of a nail bitter. The bus was 35 minutes late getting into Detroit, which was scary because my lay-over was only supposed to be 5o minutes. Luckily, my next bus was 15 minutes late for it’s scheduled departure. In the end I had just enough time to charge my laptop up to 46% (and I’m down back to 7% right now, but that’s cuz I’ve had my ipod charging this whole 2nd half) and to grab a bag of chips out of the vending machine. Sweet. Gotta love traveling by bus.
Even better, and this is truly a great thing, is that this was by far my easiest border crossing EVER. And I’ve been back and forth more than a few. They hardly even looked at my passport, just “How long are you going to be visiting” and I was back on the bus.
Even better than that, if it can be true, is that one of the women whom I answered a Nanning ad for called literally as the bus was pulling out of the Detroit station and we were approaching the Canadian border. A good omen. Maybe I’ll be employed soon!
I’m down to 3%, and only approx. 5 more hours to go! Hope my ipod can last that long….
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