July 5, 2004

Lots of things to talk about.
First of all, right after I wrote that update on my neck - the swelling went down dramatically. There’s still pain in my shoulder/back muscles, but the bump is down significantly I think.

Secondly: Yesterday was the Fourth Of July. I haven’t been in the States for Independence Day in, at the very least 6 years, I’m gonna guess it’s more like 10 years. I have to say, I had a fabulous holiday. During the winter you can maybe find 50 people in my town at one time. Yesterday I went into town, and had to walk 1/2 a mile just to get into town because I was forced to park away so far. I got into town and was shocked, shocked I tell you, to see all the people lined up on main street (ok, pretty much the ONLY street) for the parade. It was so fun. I ran into a friend or two, and then just sat myself on the ground and watched the cars go by as kids from cars/floats tossed candy to kids lining the street.

I celebrated the rest of the holiday by deep cleaning my apartment. And that night, celebrated the good-ol-american way: I went and saw fireworks. Now maybe I just haven’t seen fireworks in so long, or maybe my friend who said they the town I went to had the best fireworks in the county was right, but I was simply amazed by the fireworks. I went to the waterfront by myself and there was a MASS of people, double or even triple the size from the parade, and I just plopped myself down in the middle of all of then to stare in wonder at the sky. Fireworks are a wonder, they were amazing to watch and I really enjoyed getting to just sit and enjoy them.

Thirdly, lastly for you who have hung in there and read all this; I just finished watching Scrubs Season 1. Which is also fun. I’d like to point out this dorky fact: the guy on the show who plays Franklin (I think he’s only in like 1 or 2 episode) is the actor who now plays Hiro on Heroes. Yep, I’m the kinda geek that notices that sort of thing.


July 3, 2007

I need to toughen up. Or rather, I need to learn how to not wear my heart on my sleeve. I’ve always been bad at this. People can tell my mood, tell what’s going on with me, just by looking at me. Sometimes I’m sure this is positive, but really, it’s a bad thing probably. I need to learn to hide what’s going on. Toughen Up.

sleeplessness

I had nightmares last night. I haven't had nightmares in awhile. I usually have nightmares when I watch scary tv shows or movies, the last time I remember having nightmares was Halloween when I watched "Shawn of the Dead." Yes, I know it's a comedy, but that's how fearful I am of Zombies. Zombies, Ghosts, things that go bump in the dark - just about anything that can jump out at you in the night, I'm afraid of it. And the visuals of these things gets into my psyche and I have nightmares at nights when I watch them. So in general, I avoid scary stuff.
Which is why it's weird that I had nightmares last night, because I haven't watched anything scary in some time. But I haven't been sleeping well at all over the past week. I've been sleeping horribly all night till the sun comes up, I can clear my mind, and then I sleep fine for a couple hours. Last night, I think there were ghosts in my dreams, but mostly the nightmare was permeated with a sense of dread and fear. Not so fun.
I was especially looking forward to a good-nights sleep, because I'd worn myself out yesterday afternoon. Around 8 at night I decided it was time for bike ride. I thought I could make it around the local lake, but didn't realize that I was biting off more than I could chew, or rather, bike. Still, in total, I biked 11 miles last night.
And this afternoon, after I leave work, I'm hoping to go for a run. 3 miles, but enough to get the blood flowing.
Side note: I've started "Swingers", another possibly sad movie that has me in stitches. Because it, like "High Fidelity" is, just so, good. Or money I should say. It's shot so well, and the general "mise-en-scene" (spelling on that?) is right on. It's based in truth, and the dialogue, and the music, and actors, all combine to make it another fantastic, time-less film.
oh yes, and before I forget: update on my surgery: It's been hurting a bit more lately. Just tingly and frustrating in the muscle connecting my neck and shoulder. Also, i feel like it still looks huge, the bump, but everyone assures me that it will be weeks before the swelling goes down.