Beowulf.
I hate Beowulf.
First time around in high school - hated it. Grendel, Beowulf, grrrrr....
Second time around in Medieval Lit in college - hated it again. Sure, it's the new "amazing" edition, but grrrrr.
And now it's the movie.
I've only seen previews, but what the hell is Angelina Jollie doing in there?
I
don't want to write in all caps, because it's annoying - like Angelina
in Beowulf- so you'll just have to imagine me shouting this:
There is no female in Beowulf! Ok,
granted, I'm remembering this from high school and college, but I think
I would remember a naked woman tempting Beowulf. (Anyone else catching
theadam-eve thing, always present in medieval literature)
Beowulf is about man conquering monster. Beowulf is about man becoming legend. It is not about women.
Mostly, I hate Beowulf for creeping into my life again, because with this movie - and my hatred for Angelina Jollie in it - I will read it again.
Grrrrrr......
post script: but how awesome does "I'm Not There," the new bio-film on Bob Dylan look?
That's right; the answer is awesome!
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Friday, October 26, 2007
The Fourth Question
My mom said she read my last post and had this question she would ask:
What role did you play in your broken heart?
I took a second to think, and this was my reply:
My role was two-fold.
Firstly, I should have ended it sooner. In my heart of hearts I knew it was over long before it officially ended, but I was too attached to really accept it. Holding on that long contribued to my being that much more hurt in the end. Realization from that: I recognize that I often do that; hold on to things for too long. Also, the hard but neccesary life lesson that you can fight as hard as you want for something, but wishin, and hopin, and prayin, and even fightin, just don't make it so sometimes.
Secondly, I censored myself in the relationship.
I can pinpoint exact moments when I did it, when I learned to.
I so desperately wanted to please; wanted to keep it going, that I forgot to that just being myself should be enough. I lost myself in the relationship, lost my heart, and by censoring it, contributed to it's broken state in the end.
Beyond that, I'm back in Chicago for the weekend. Should be fantastic, and will be very, very busy. Also, I resigned from my job officially, my last day will be November 16. Obviously, this is big news and probably deserves it's own posting, but it's too late for spouting about broken-hearts, jobs, and new adventures that await. One for now, the others can come later.
What role did you play in your broken heart?
I took a second to think, and this was my reply:
My role was two-fold.
Firstly, I should have ended it sooner. In my heart of hearts I knew it was over long before it officially ended, but I was too attached to really accept it. Holding on that long contribued to my being that much more hurt in the end. Realization from that: I recognize that I often do that; hold on to things for too long. Also, the hard but neccesary life lesson that you can fight as hard as you want for something, but wishin, and hopin, and prayin, and even fightin, just don't make it so sometimes.
Secondly, I censored myself in the relationship.
I can pinpoint exact moments when I did it, when I learned to.
I so desperately wanted to please; wanted to keep it going, that I forgot to that just being myself should be enough. I lost myself in the relationship, lost my heart, and by censoring it, contributed to it's broken state in the end.
Beyond that, I'm back in Chicago for the weekend. Should be fantastic, and will be very, very busy. Also, I resigned from my job officially, my last day will be November 16. Obviously, this is big news and probably deserves it's own posting, but it's too late for spouting about broken-hearts, jobs, and new adventures that await. One for now, the others can come later.
Monday, October 15, 2007
Three Questions
So the deal is, I asked my friend three questions. She answered, and then asked me three questions and now I answer them here. If you'd like, you can ask three questions in the comments and I'll answer them on this blog. Then I'll ask you three and you have to answer them somewhere (if you have a blog, on your blog. If not, then...I guess in the comments?). So here goes:
1.) I heart that story question, so I'm going to make you answer your own question. So Al, what's your story?
When I hear that question, or when I ask it, I antcipate a mini-history; I hear a parallel quesition of "How did you get here at this moment?" (Which is so interesting because Katie didn't answer it that way at all.)
Anyways, on with the answer:
My story? Well, I grew up in a western suburb of Chicago, went to a small liberal arts college outside Chicago where I majored in Print Journalism and got a minor in Philosophy. I then moved to Vermnot for 5 months, then moved to Michigan where I've worked for over a little over 2 years. My circle of friends from high school still make up my close circle of friends, along with people I've meet from the wilderness camp I worked at in Northern Ontario. I am currently recovering from a broken heart and am at another cross-roads in my life, which is scary but thrilling. I am a strong, funny, smart, nurotic female who likes to ask a lot of questions.
(that was a little combo of the two ways that question could be perceived I think).
2.) If you could eat only one thing for the rest of your days what would it be? If you could only read one thing? Watch one thing? Listen to one...CD?
eat: cheese
watch: the west wing
listen to: npr (1. this american life 2.wait, wait don't tell me)
one musical artist: this is a scary leep for me, but I'm gonna go with Wilco. I mean, if it's for the rest of my life, that's a long time and I think they do the best job of mashing amazing music with amazing lyrics. But David Gray or The Frames is a close second.
wait, you asked for cd: so I would go with Kicking Television by Wilco, cuz it's live, so it's got a cross collection from multiple cds.
When you imagine your future, what does it look like?
Oh god, the question of the moment isn't it!
This is what I know for certain: I am in a city. Most likely, Chicago.
Let me close my eyes and imagine it: it's impossible. Seriously, I'm just barely getting the next couple years together. I can tell you what I've learned about myself enough to know that in the future: I will be in a city, and making the best of whatever decisions I have made. I will most likely not have a lot of money, but still eating out, buying presents for friends, and traveling. That's all I got so far.
1.) I heart that story question, so I'm going to make you answer your own question. So Al, what's your story?
When I hear that question, or when I ask it, I antcipate a mini-history; I hear a parallel quesition of "How did you get here at this moment?" (Which is so interesting because Katie didn't answer it that way at all.)
Anyways, on with the answer:
My story? Well, I grew up in a western suburb of Chicago, went to a small liberal arts college outside Chicago where I majored in Print Journalism and got a minor in Philosophy. I then moved to Vermnot for 5 months, then moved to Michigan where I've worked for over a little over 2 years. My circle of friends from high school still make up my close circle of friends, along with people I've meet from the wilderness camp I worked at in Northern Ontario. I am currently recovering from a broken heart and am at another cross-roads in my life, which is scary but thrilling. I am a strong, funny, smart, nurotic female who likes to ask a lot of questions.
(that was a little combo of the two ways that question could be perceived I think).
2.) If you could eat only one thing for the rest of your days what would it be? If you could only read one thing? Watch one thing? Listen to one...CD?
eat: cheese
watch: the west wing
listen to: npr (1. this american life 2.wait, wait don't tell me)
one musical artist: this is a scary leep for me, but I'm gonna go with Wilco. I mean, if it's for the rest of my life, that's a long time and I think they do the best job of mashing amazing music with amazing lyrics. But David Gray or The Frames is a close second.
wait, you asked for cd: so I would go with Kicking Television by Wilco, cuz it's live, so it's got a cross collection from multiple cds.
When you imagine your future, what does it look like?
Oh god, the question of the moment isn't it!
This is what I know for certain: I am in a city. Most likely, Chicago.
Let me close my eyes and imagine it: it's impossible. Seriously, I'm just barely getting the next couple years together. I can tell you what I've learned about myself enough to know that in the future: I will be in a city, and making the best of whatever decisions I have made. I will most likely not have a lot of money, but still eating out, buying presents for friends, and traveling. That's all I got so far.
Friday, October 12, 2007
Feelin' Alright - Joe Crocker
Today was a great work day. I got to meet all the people/parents that I email every day. I was "schmoozing" with parents all day, and I was good at it. It was fun. I enjoyed getting to talk and help people.
Highlights at the end of the day were, in order:
a.) A new co-worker just sitting and hanging out with me at my desk at the end of the day, just to talk. We just got to know each other better, and that was nice.
b.) A different co-worker walking by, even later in the day; stoping at my desk to say "I just want you to know: You really shine in this position. You are this glue to the school, and you do it really well. Thank you."
c.) I had to get up alone infront of, literally, about 100 people and do a five minute intro about the junior trip I lead two weeks ago. I introduced myself - "Hello, my name is Alexandra Lastname and I am the face behind all those emails you get everyday." And they clapped.
All the parents in the audience clapped in appreciation of my work. I mean, how awesome is that. That's a pretty good day.
After that I got to watch the seniors do their presention; it was emotionally really hard. It's hard because I don't think I'll be here to watch them graduate, I don't think I can stay here to do that. And because there are so many sophomores that I think are fabulous and I won't be there to take them on their junior trip next year.
But that's the way it's gotta be. It just is. To qoute the song "feelin alright" by Joe Cocker that was used in another presentation tonight:
Seems I got to have a change of scene
Cause every night I have the strangest dreams
Imprisoned by the way it used to be
Left here on my own or so it seems
I got to leave before I start to scream
Highlights at the end of the day were, in order:
a.) A new co-worker just sitting and hanging out with me at my desk at the end of the day, just to talk. We just got to know each other better, and that was nice.
b.) A different co-worker walking by, even later in the day; stoping at my desk to say "I just want you to know: You really shine in this position. You are this glue to the school, and you do it really well. Thank you."
c.) I had to get up alone infront of, literally, about 100 people and do a five minute intro about the junior trip I lead two weeks ago. I introduced myself - "Hello, my name is Alexandra Lastname and I am the face behind all those emails you get everyday." And they clapped.
All the parents in the audience clapped in appreciation of my work. I mean, how awesome is that. That's a pretty good day.
After that I got to watch the seniors do their presention; it was emotionally really hard. It's hard because I don't think I'll be here to watch them graduate, I don't think I can stay here to do that. And because there are so many sophomores that I think are fabulous and I won't be there to take them on their junior trip next year.
But that's the way it's gotta be. It just is. To qoute the song "feelin alright" by Joe Cocker that was used in another presentation tonight:
Seems I got to have a change of scene
Cause every night I have the strangest dreams
Imprisoned by the way it used to be
Left here on my own or so it seems
I got to leave before I start to scream
Monday, October 8, 2007
t-shirts, faux-hawks, and happiness
1.) Why are girl's shirts cut so short? Reminder to self - next time am
buying/ordering a t-shirt, just go with the male-styled one, they look just as good on girls, if not better; I dare say, sexier.
2.) My kid, when I have one (a million years from now) will totally have a faux-hawk for the first few years of it's life. So cute I think.
3.) I think waiting to get married till your 30 has at the very least has this advantage: You do it the way YOU want to. The people I saw get married this weekend (30 & 31 years of age) know themselves well enough now to know what they want for their ceremony - which included the bride walking down the "aisle" from a trolley, an outside but still spiritual place, a tuxedo-kilt, and ending in a big party with live band AND DJ.
a.) It was great wedding, and I'll paraphrase from the groom's vows because they seemed true & from the heart that they really struck me:
"Growing-up is a process of moving away from your parents, from the support you've always known, and going out and looking for that support in other places. I believe I've found that support and love in you, and I am so excited to start our lives
together out of that love and support; I believe we can do anything..... I am happy. I am happy, I am happy.
buying/ordering a t-shirt, just go with the male-styled one, they look just as good on girls, if not better; I dare say, sexier.
2.) My kid, when I have one (a million years from now) will totally have a faux-hawk for the first few years of it's life. So cute I think.
3.) I think waiting to get married till your 30 has at the very least has this advantage: You do it the way YOU want to. The people I saw get married this weekend (30 & 31 years of age) know themselves well enough now to know what they want for their ceremony - which included the bride walking down the "aisle" from a trolley, an outside but still spiritual place, a tuxedo-kilt, and ending in a big party with live band AND DJ.
a.) It was great wedding, and I'll paraphrase from the groom's vows because they seemed true & from the heart that they really struck me:
"Growing-up is a process of moving away from your parents, from the support you've always known, and going out and looking for that support in other places. I believe I've found that support and love in you, and I am so excited to start our lives
together out of that love and support; I believe we can do anything..... I am happy. I am happy, I am happy.
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