snap shots of saturday

I had a pretty great Saturday night all by myself here in my apartment.


I weeded out some of my Christmas ornaments, placing only the select few that made it through on my childhood Christmas tree. Still think I must be missing a box of my ornaments since the star is missing. Nonetheless, I kinda like my tree a little sparse this year, it's so nice to have it up.


Technically, I did some homework. This consisted of typing up paper requirements and the paragraph that's in my text book on my paper topic while listening to Planet Money podcasts.

Then, catching up on my This American Life podcasts, I baked some cupcakes. I'm starting to experiment with decorating with frosting. Last time I tried out some Gel frosting and accidentally died my co-workers' mouths blue. So, this time I went with some real frosting, and it was little shaky. But for the first go around, not bad right?




of course, I also fitted in some knitting. Had a pretty good time with all that too, just me, myself, and i.

Probably should have fit in a bit more homework though. This is the last week of the semester, and this is what I've got: one presentation this Monday, one 6-8 page paper due next Monday, one book discussion next Monday, and one 8-10 page paper due next Wednesday. Let you know how it all goes when I resurface in a week...

Sah

I got this piece of advice last night from a far off but very close friend. In a matter of fact, this-is-what-you-are-going-to-do way she said "You need to just take care of Alex, the rest will come after you focus on yourself."

I totally appreciate what she has to say. And I agree, completely. I've gotten this advice many times before, from various sources, and that's why -

- it just occurred to me, (that's how these blogs seem to happen - I'm in the middle of writing some paper, stare off into space for a second as the song changes on my ipod to some Beyonce pop feminism, and then I'm struck into thought on something I feel compelled to explore inarticulately here). Where was I again, oh yes -

Haven't I been "taking care of myself" for well over a year now? It was a year ago, probably this very week, that I left my secure full time job where I was miserable to go to Toronto, to be taken in by friends and figure my shit out? Wasn't that taking care of myself? Moving home was hard, and while I don't know if I would call it a year of little stress or anything, I was pretty focused on myself. Getting myself a job, getting myself into grad school, getting myself into an apartment. I've leaned on my friends and family pretty heavily this year, and focused a lot on what I needed to do.

I've typed and then deleted three different threads of thought from there, so I'm just gonna get back to this paper - my last Read and React of the semester, thank goodness.

Oh but before I forget, I need to run a correction - The drummer of Kings of Leon, Nathan Followill, is not the rest of the band mate's cousin, he's a brother. Caleb, Jared, and Nathan = brothers. Matthew, who plays guitar, he's their cousin. No matter really, I'm in love with them all. They are playing a benefit concert in Chicago the night before my birthday in January, but it being for a good cause and all, ticket prices are now $150 - 200, and if I have $150 to spend (really, $300, cuz who wants to go alone?) I'm inclined to spend it on other essentials. So next time around boys, just make sure you make it back here to Chicago again soon.

Wordy

1. Have been listening to the new Kings of Leon album, >Only_By_The_Night>. I wasn't in love with it on the first listen, but I think that's due to the fact that I'm so in love with their album "Because of the Times". However, there are some songs that I cannot stop listening to, and my adoration is only growing for this new album. In particular, the songs Use Somebody, Manhattan, and Be Somebody. I'm kinda enamored with them lately. For one, they are very cute (and of course, I'm most intrigued with the long haired, glasses wearing drummer Nathan), and they are of course talented. They also come from this crazy religious background, their dad (the three other band members are brothers, Nathan is their cousin) was a pentecostal minister, and that just throws me in a way I can't seem to articulate. So I guess it'll just have to end at that.

2. Did not end up going to the Obama rally. There is of course a part of me that wishes I had, mostly because I didn't end up getting anything done on my paper anayways - too busy checking the results online - and would have really enjoyed being in the city on a night so filled with love - I think I could have really used that. But I'm not really dwelling on it too much, what's the point of regret? It is what it is. I do have to include this here, from my friend who wrote me an email after that blog post, and this is a summarization:
I laughed and laughed at your blog post. So typically Al, always worried about what your missing out on.

Kinda called me on my shit and put me in my place, which really is appreciated. Think I needed to hear that and am, have been, as always, trying again to just appreciate being in this moment.

3. As for this moment right now - spent all day finishing up a paper for this big group project. And it feels so good to have it written, but I did take my time. I like having the time to procrastinate. I write a little, wander the internet (what did I do to procrastinate before the internet?), write a little more. A lot of the that wandering the internet is spent on facebook, and I found these two things today:
My friend Chris posted this, which is a little old, but as a West Wing fanatic, and Obama supporter, I loved endlessly:

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/09/21/opinion/21dowd-sorkin.html

thank you Chris!

Also, found this Addicted to West Wing application on facebook which has a ton of West Wing quotes, which is unfortunate for you all, because it means I'll just post them more regularly, like this one:

I want women to have help from the government. I want women to earn what men earn. I want everyone to earn enough so that everyone can make the right choice for their family. After that, it's none of your business who stays home and who goes to work." - Amy Gardner.


4. There was something else....
Oh yeah. So a couple weeks ago, my friends and I were on a bus, talking about a the upcoming Halloween Party my friend was throwing. Conversation turns to the guest list and whose coming, and Friend 1 says some guy's name that I don't know and Friend 2 says, "Oh, he's coming? Isn't he single? Maybe Al can make out with him?" I was only half paying attention considering I didn't know anyone coming to the party and didn't really follow as the conversation went in some totally other direction and forgot about it till the party. But after the Halloween Party I asked Friend 2 on the drive home, "hey, why did you say that last week about that guy?" Her response: "I dunno, you're both single."
Seriously, this is the qualifications now for hooking up? Just gather the two single people you know, maybe they'll make out. I didn't realize that became a factor in the game as you get older, since the number of single people shrinks eventually all of us single people will just couple up? Ironically Friend 2, also single, so I'm even more perplexed as to why it would be that I would get together with this guy. I guess out of the three of us at that party who were single (no wait, 6 single people, 6 couples, a ratio of one couple for every single person) I would be the one to do it. Not really sure if I'm as comfortable with that piece of mirror being held up.
This gets into a whole other territory of a us vs. them = couples vs. singletons blog that could be interesting, but I'm not really sure where I'm going with it. It's just going to get so much more interesting as we get older.

Obviously, I am in this wordy rambling thought kinda place (can you tell I've been writing all day?!) so I should just end this now before I get myself into any more trouble.
Cheers.

Defining Moments

Heres the scene:

I have this HUGE group project due next Wednesday. It's a case study of a public library, involving a 20 minute presentation and a 12 - 20 page group paper.
I was a good student all weekend. I didn't drink at a Halloween party Friday so I would be good to spend all day Saturday doing homework, which I did, till about 1:00 am. Got up 8:00 am on Sunday and kept at it till 2:00 pm, finishing a paper for another class.
And that felt so good, having spent the time and got this thing done, and I could go out and enjoy celebrating a good friend's birthday that night.

Now it's Monday night, I had class. Tomorrow night, my friend is hosting a Election Party, and I said I can't go because I have to do homework. Which is true. My group is meeting on Wednesday so we can get our shit together for next week. This means tomorrow night, Tuesday night, I need to get some of my own shit together for the project. As a good grad student, I should stay in and do homework.

But as a citizen, as a Chicagoan, as a voter, I would really love to just go downtown tomorrow night and see the show. Obama is hosting an election night rally at Grant Park, and while I do not have tickets, I would still love to just go down and just see how far into the city I could get. Just be in loop. Just be there.
This is going to be historic, either way. I mean, how many times can you live in the same city as the possible President Elect? This is once in a life time, to be in a position to so close to history.

But this project is worth 30% of my grade. Grrrr.....
I called my friend/fellow student Sheila tonight. We call each other whenever we're having "god damn grad school!!! AHHHH" moments. We're also in the same group for this project, and both feeling the pinch about it. I was saying, you know, can you imagine you grandkids saying "Grammy, where were you when Obama was elected president?" And my answers gonna be, "oh, I was in the basement of the library working on a paper." But beyond that. Screw the grandkids, for my life time, it would be an amazing experience. I'm a person whose fairly interest in politics and current events, and love being on my own in a big city.
Plus, Sheila made this point at the end of the conversation, "You should go. Do not let 9/11 be the defining moment of your lifetime." This really struck me. I mean, for my lifetime, what the grandkids will be asking so far is "Where were you on 9/11?" It would be nice to have a moment that's on the opposite scale of momentous to add be defining.

I'm not really sure what I'm gonna do. Having homework really effects my immediate day-to-day life. And I would feel guilt that if I did skip on that paper for the night, I should be at my friends party.

OK, I'll I'll be honest, this is is the plan for my day" Get up before the sun to go vote, then go to work, then go work on this project all night checking the internet all night trying to see what's going on.

But I'm hopeful that tomorrow there will be a new defining moment for our country, no matter where I am personally.

Under vs. Grad.

From the view of this table on one side of the university library basement, I can see four people, including myself, that are here. I would bet money that almost all of us, are grad students or obtaining some higher degree than a bachelors. How do I know this? Because it is 7:30 pm on a Saturday night.

That is the difference between undergrad and graduate student. Even if I did not have plans on Saturday night as a undergrad - and in all likelihood, that was the case - the last place I would have been was the library.
But as a grad student, so many more responsibilities have entered your life. And I say this as someone who as an undergrad had 3 different jobs, was a full time student, and belonged to too many campus groups. Now, I have one job, and it takes up 30 hours of my week. And still, here I sit on a Saturday night - the university library. Because this is the time during my week that I have several unscheduled hours to just sit here and write papers.