Firstly, this has not been a fun day.
Secondly, I did go for a run after I wrote the first update blog of the day. It's 81 degrees, very sunny, and my run was very hot. I went 3 miles.
I just got another call from the doctor's office. They explained how they had made that CAT-scan appoitment for me, but then the insurance company was contacted and they gave the doctors office the "run around" (i think that's code for "they won't pay for it"). So, the doctors office has gone ahead and made me an appoitment with a surgeon. Apparently, the insurance will pay for a consultantion with a surgeon, but not a CAT-scan to see what it actually is that the surgeon would be taking out.
I've gone from cat-scan to surgeon. This day is sucky.
Tuesday, May 22, 2007
update
this is a pre-running a blog - aka, a procrastinating running blog.
Just wanted to give an update on the love hump: The doctor's office finally called (at 5:00pm on Monday - almost a full week after I went in) and the X-rays show us nothing.
Not all that surprising.
So, the doctor's office said they made me an appointment with the CAT-scan place, but being the nice people that they are, they assumed nights would be better, which since I work at night, they are not. So I had to call the place and re-schedule.
Next update on the "mass over C-7" will be after my Cat-scan, on May 30th.
ok, now I gotta go run.
Just wanted to give an update on the love hump: The doctor's office finally called (at 5:00pm on Monday - almost a full week after I went in) and the X-rays show us nothing.
Not all that surprising.
So, the doctor's office said they made me an appointment with the CAT-scan place, but being the nice people that they are, they assumed nights would be better, which since I work at night, they are not. So I had to call the place and re-schedule.
Next update on the "mass over C-7" will be after my Cat-scan, on May 30th.
ok, now I gotta go run.
Saturday, May 19, 2007
one if by foot, two if by bike
I have many things buzzing around my head to blog about (home, college town, bridal shower, etc) but since i ACTUALLY went running today, I think I should first blog about that.
My mom wanted to ride her bike and somehow she got me to go running with her, cuz we didn't have two bikes. SO i went, for the first time since Monday, and it was really good. It felt good to get out there I guess, it was kinda hard, but not terribly so. It was interesting to be on a bike path and in a park and have no idea how far I was going. When I got back home i went to a website (again,if I were cool and had more motivation to figure it out and weren't so fearful that I would end up just losing all that I've written, I would put a link right here) called : www.gmap-pedometer.com and figured out how far I went. Ends up, I went about 3 miles. Pretty good for not having run in a week and not knowing how far I went, i thought it was shorter than that, so I'm proud. Now lets see if I go tomorrow.
Even better after my run though, I took my mom's bike out for a spin. A 4.5 route, that made me kinda sweaty. The bike thing was kinda a test -run about getting a bike. My mom's is a road bike (vs. a mountain bike) and I like it, because to be honest, I don't see myself doing many sweet jumps off roading, or really, off roading in general. The interesting thing about biking was realizing that I can see myself enjoying it more out "in the country" - aka, back in Michigan. This is because, I would get going on the bike, and then have to slow down for cars at stop signs before crossing streets, or turning corners. Out in the country, I could get some speed on the road, and just keep going. The bike did really work my legs, although maybe the inside of my legs a little too much - I have the feeling my inner thighs may kill tomorrow. None-the-less, it's definitely got me thinking about getting a bike.
My mom wanted to ride her bike and somehow she got me to go running with her, cuz we didn't have two bikes. SO i went, for the first time since Monday, and it was really good. It felt good to get out there I guess, it was kinda hard, but not terribly so. It was interesting to be on a bike path and in a park and have no idea how far I was going. When I got back home i went to a website (again,if I were cool and had more motivation to figure it out and weren't so fearful that I would end up just losing all that I've written, I would put a link right here) called : www.gmap-pedometer.com and figured out how far I went. Ends up, I went about 3 miles. Pretty good for not having run in a week and not knowing how far I went, i thought it was shorter than that, so I'm proud. Now lets see if I go tomorrow.
Even better after my run though, I took my mom's bike out for a spin. A 4.5 route, that made me kinda sweaty. The bike thing was kinda a test -run about getting a bike. My mom's is a road bike (vs. a mountain bike) and I like it, because to be honest, I don't see myself doing many sweet jumps off roading, or really, off roading in general. The interesting thing about biking was realizing that I can see myself enjoying it more out "in the country" - aka, back in Michigan. This is because, I would get going on the bike, and then have to slow down for cars at stop signs before crossing streets, or turning corners. Out in the country, I could get some speed on the road, and just keep going. The bike did really work my legs, although maybe the inside of my legs a little too much - I have the feeling my inner thighs may kill tomorrow. None-the-less, it's definitely got me thinking about getting a bike.
Friday, May 18, 2007
11:50 pm central time/12:50 am eastern time
i am very cranky.
and I can't seem to sleep, even though I am also very tired.
not being able to sleep is adding to my crankiness.
being cranky is adding to my lack of sleep.
I am very cranky.
That is all.
ps.
but I do love studio 60 on my ipod
and I can't seem to sleep, even though I am also very tired.
not being able to sleep is adding to my crankiness.
being cranky is adding to my lack of sleep.
I am very cranky.
That is all.
ps.
but I do love studio 60 on my ipod
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
my love hump
I had to go to the doctors yesterday. Technically, I've had to go to the doctors for at least a year now, but I actually went yesterday. I have this thing, this, I don't know how else to describe it, - it's a hump. I have a hump on the back of my neck. It's this big bump that sits right where my neck meets my shoulders. It looks like I got whacked in the back of the neck with a baseball or something.
And as far as I can remember, it's been there about a year. Yes, I should have gotten it checked out then, when I was first made away of it. Yes, I have been to the doctor's office in the past year, but I forgot to ask about it; because, you know, it's on my back, so it's not like I see it every day.
But I am starting to notice it - in pictures taken of me I can see it, my neck is starting to ache all the time and I think it's from my head being pushed up against the hump when I sleep at night. For these reasons, and concerns for my health and the mystery of the hump, I went to the doctor yesterday.
It's a scary thing going to the doctor for a lump that you don't know what it is. And I would say that's more scary leaving the doctor's office and still not knowing what a lump is, except for that was the outcome I expected (I mean, what is the Dr. REALLY going to do at this point, just lay her hands on me and instantly know what's wrong with me? doubt it).
The doctor felt around on my neck and back and the lump (it feels kinda hard and unmovable to the touch) and said it felt like a "some medical word I don't know what it is". I asked "what's that" - and she said, a "fatty tissue deposit". But there's really no way to know for certain. So I needed to get x-rays, and if those don't tell us what it is, then I will need to get a cat-scan. And from there we will hopefully know what it is, and will move accordingly from there.
So I walked out of the doctor's office with a piece of paper with her horrible doctor's hand-writing (seriously, the stereotype has it's base in fact!) down the street about two blocks to the Professional Building at the hospital. (Cool thing about my doctor's office/the hospital in the "big city" hear here: it used to be an old insane asylum. It was open from the 1890s - the 1980s and the buildings that aren't repaired are totally creepy and cool. They opened the very modern and medical hospital on the same grounds/right near the old mental hospital, and now the old mental buildings are being renovated to become office - like for my doctor - restaurants, condos, and a retirement center. It's very cool). So I was able to walk myself over from my doctor's office over to the back of the Professional Building, where I handed over my piece of paper and was registered with the hospital.
I was asked the typical - for ID & health-care card, my address, my phone number, sign this waver. But it's also so weird to ask be asked to give a name of someone in case of emergency, and not give my mom's name, because my mom is 6 hours away, and what is she gonna do if I collapse in the radiology room? Another question in case I for some reason collapse in the hospital - do I have any religious preference? I replied that I did not.
After answering questions, working with the woman to decipher what the doctor had actually written for what I needed to get x-rayed ("mass over C1- T7" , not "pass on T1-C7" - by the way that C1- T7 stuff means the number of vertebra that they needed to get x-rayed, my hump rests right above vertebra seven where the neck vertebra meets the back vertebra, which I think is totally fascinating. ) I was to put the paperwork in that now resided in a folder into the radiology shelving unit on my way to the woman's dressing room. Where I changed from my waist up into a lovely blue polka dot patterned gown that only tied behind my neck, took off my earrings, my glasses, and sat and read my book before a nurse came and took me down the hospital hallways filled with empty wheelchairs and medical machinery to a very beige room filled with giant beige colored medical instruments.
I had to be reminded by the Nurse to take out my cartilage earring too, which I had totally forgotten about. Then I had to stand in-front of some machine, facing the right, as the Nurse adjusted the "x-ray camera" coming out of this crazy/cool overlapping beam rigged system on the ceiling that allowed the camera to move about the room. Then I was moved to face the camera head on, then slightly to the right, jaw up, mouth open. Same pose, mouth closed. Now to the left, jaw up, mouth open. One with jaw closed. One with jaw straight out, mouth closed. Now over to the table, lay on cold table top, adjust camera. Hold your breath. Move to the side. Hold your breath. Good. Now, left arm above head, right arm at your side. Hold your breath. Now, same position, but bend your knees to stabilize you, because it's very important that you not move at all
during this one. You can breath, but don't move at all. Ok, lay still. Ok, done. But wait here, we're gonna have a look at them.
While they look at them, I can hear the nurse say "ok, hold your breath" and I hold my breath, although not knowing what for, as I'm sitting crossed-leg and hunched over on the table, and the camera's not near me. Only to let out my breath and realize she's talking to some other patient in the other room.
We do end up taking a couple more - some of the ones with my mouth open, or closed, I'm not sure, my teeth were blocking what they were trying to take pictures of behind the teeth. The Nurses (there were two at this point) move my head with their hands till my body is exactly where they want it to be.
Then it's "Ok, that's it, your done." Back to the changing room, and out the hospital doors. My doctor's office will get back to my next week "at the latest" (which you think it would be sooner, as the x-rays are only two blocks from their office).
It was strange being in an radiology room in a hospital, being in a blue-polka-dot patterned gown,and not knowing what is going on with me. It made me realize why it's taken me a year to actually go to the doctor - a "ignorance is bliss" & "what you can't see can't hurt you" mentality: if I can't seem the lump, then I don't know about the lump, and then I can't worry about the lump.
Now, I worry about the lump. But, hopefully, the x-rays will show, it's a fatty tissue build up, and we'll see what happens from there.
And as far as I can remember, it's been there about a year. Yes, I should have gotten it checked out then, when I was first made away of it. Yes, I have been to the doctor's office in the past year, but I forgot to ask about it; because, you know, it's on my back, so it's not like I see it every day.
But I am starting to notice it - in pictures taken of me I can see it, my neck is starting to ache all the time and I think it's from my head being pushed up against the hump when I sleep at night. For these reasons, and concerns for my health and the mystery of the hump, I went to the doctor yesterday.
It's a scary thing going to the doctor for a lump that you don't know what it is. And I would say that's more scary leaving the doctor's office and still not knowing what a lump is, except for that was the outcome I expected (I mean, what is the Dr. REALLY going to do at this point, just lay her hands on me and instantly know what's wrong with me? doubt it).
The doctor felt around on my neck and back and the lump (it feels kinda hard and unmovable to the touch) and said it felt like a "some medical word I don't know what it is". I asked "what's that" - and she said, a "fatty tissue deposit". But there's really no way to know for certain. So I needed to get x-rays, and if those don't tell us what it is, then I will need to get a cat-scan. And from there we will hopefully know what it is, and will move accordingly from there.
So I walked out of the doctor's office with a piece of paper with her horrible doctor's hand-writing (seriously, the stereotype has it's base in fact!) down the street about two blocks to the Professional Building at the hospital. (Cool thing about my doctor's office/the hospital in the "big city" hear here: it used to be an old insane asylum. It was open from the 1890s - the 1980s and the buildings that aren't repaired are totally creepy and cool. They opened the very modern and medical hospital on the same grounds/right near the old mental hospital, and now the old mental buildings are being renovated to become office - like for my doctor - restaurants, condos, and a retirement center. It's very cool). So I was able to walk myself over from my doctor's office over to the back of the Professional Building, where I handed over my piece of paper and was registered with the hospital.
I was asked the typical - for ID & health-care card, my address, my phone number, sign this waver. But it's also so weird to ask be asked to give a name of someone in case of emergency, and not give my mom's name, because my mom is 6 hours away, and what is she gonna do if I collapse in the radiology room? Another question in case I for some reason collapse in the hospital - do I have any religious preference? I replied that I did not.
After answering questions, working with the woman to decipher what the doctor had actually written for what I needed to get x-rayed ("mass over C1- T7" , not "pass on T1-C7" - by the way that C1- T7 stuff means the number of vertebra that they needed to get x-rayed, my hump rests right above vertebra seven where the neck vertebra meets the back vertebra, which I think is totally fascinating. ) I was to put the paperwork in that now resided in a folder into the radiology shelving unit on my way to the woman's dressing room. Where I changed from my waist up into a lovely blue polka dot patterned gown that only tied behind my neck, took off my earrings, my glasses, and sat and read my book before a nurse came and took me down the hospital hallways filled with empty wheelchairs and medical machinery to a very beige room filled with giant beige colored medical instruments.
I had to be reminded by the Nurse to take out my cartilage earring too, which I had totally forgotten about. Then I had to stand in-front of some machine, facing the right, as the Nurse adjusted the "x-ray camera" coming out of this crazy/cool overlapping beam rigged system on the ceiling that allowed the camera to move about the room. Then I was moved to face the camera head on, then slightly to the right, jaw up, mouth open. Same pose, mouth closed. Now to the left, jaw up, mouth open. One with jaw closed. One with jaw straight out, mouth closed. Now over to the table, lay on cold table top, adjust camera. Hold your breath. Move to the side. Hold your breath. Good. Now, left arm above head, right arm at your side. Hold your breath. Now, same position, but bend your knees to stabilize you, because it's very important that you not move at all
during this one. You can breath, but don't move at all. Ok, lay still. Ok, done. But wait here, we're gonna have a look at them.
While they look at them, I can hear the nurse say "ok, hold your breath" and I hold my breath, although not knowing what for, as I'm sitting crossed-leg and hunched over on the table, and the camera's not near me. Only to let out my breath and realize she's talking to some other patient in the other room.
We do end up taking a couple more - some of the ones with my mouth open, or closed, I'm not sure, my teeth were blocking what they were trying to take pictures of behind the teeth. The Nurses (there were two at this point) move my head with their hands till my body is exactly where they want it to be.
Then it's "Ok, that's it, your done." Back to the changing room, and out the hospital doors. My doctor's office will get back to my next week "at the latest" (which you think it would be sooner, as the x-rays are only two blocks from their office).
It was strange being in an radiology room in a hospital, being in a blue-polka-dot patterned gown,and not knowing what is going on with me. It made me realize why it's taken me a year to actually go to the doctor - a "ignorance is bliss" & "what you can't see can't hurt you" mentality: if I can't seem the lump, then I don't know about the lump, and then I can't worry about the lump.
Now, I worry about the lump. But, hopefully, the x-rays will show, it's a fatty tissue build up, and we'll see what happens from there.
Saturday, May 12, 2007
While not having written a blog in awhile, I also feel like I haven't run in some time as well. But I look at my calendar and see that I actually ran three times this past week, never under 3 miles and never over 4. (Yes, I do put little star stickers on my calendar for each day that I run - just like a 5 year old that gets a sticker from remember their phone number, and it gives me the same amoung of pride!) So it feels like I haven't run, but I have, just not terriably far. There's always this next week - and i won't be working as much, so I'm optimistic.
Speaking of working, I've been working SO much. I was just talking to my mother who realizes she's been cranky lately and realized that she's also worked at one job or another for the past 20 days. The same thing may be contributing to my own crankiness. I've worked 9 out of the last 10 days. Which is my own fault, I signed up for those days (and cannot wait for my paycheck!). But I've am very much looking forward to this coming week when I will not be working as much. And next weekend which I have taken off to go home!
I know there may be more to say, but with all this work - my mind is mush. only about 3 more waking hours of work to go - not that I'm counting.
Speaking of working, I've been working SO much. I was just talking to my mother who realizes she's been cranky lately and realized that she's also worked at one job or another for the past 20 days. The same thing may be contributing to my own crankiness. I've worked 9 out of the last 10 days. Which is my own fault, I signed up for those days (and cannot wait for my paycheck!). But I've am very much looking forward to this coming week when I will not be working as much. And next weekend which I have taken off to go home!
I know there may be more to say, but with all this work - my mind is mush. only about 3 more waking hours of work to go - not that I'm counting.
Thursday, May 3, 2007
5 mile thoughts
I just got back from a five mile run.
I keep waiting for this runner's high that everyone talks about to happen.
No, it's not the runner's high - I get that. After I go running I feel more engergized and better about myself, and those endorphines are working.
But that feeling of just going for a run and having everything else in your life melt away - I'd love for that to happen, but it never does. My thought process does so slow down, my body is concentrated on motion, but that get-away-from-it-all feeling when on a run never happens for me.
I guess all I can keep doing is try and make sure the thoughts in my head are positive ones.
I keep waiting for this runner's high that everyone talks about to happen.
No, it's not the runner's high - I get that. After I go running I feel more engergized and better about myself, and those endorphines are working.
But that feeling of just going for a run and having everything else in your life melt away - I'd love for that to happen, but it never does. My thought process does so slow down, my body is concentrated on motion, but that get-away-from-it-all feeling when on a run never happens for me.
I guess all I can keep doing is try and make sure the thoughts in my head are positive ones.
Tuesday, May 1, 2007
one word, ha!
A.) I think it's a little alarming that I like to write so much/ think in lists. ( I don't know the proper terminology on this, but it's something, you know, where you put A.) B.), and then go to roman numerals, I can't think of the term. i'd ask for some help, but it's late and no one is around and I don't even know how to look that up on the internet)
I.) I do think it shows a lot of my obsessive compulsive/way my brain works.
i.) wonder what the need to use lots of slash marks is all about?
B.) I have gone running the past three days (3 miles, 4 miles, 4 miles) and thought up 3 different blogs to write about while running. But at this point, I don't really feel like trying to get all that out of me and onto the "paper".
C.) So I'm going to steal a MeMe (aka, self-indulgent survey) off a friends blog (again, if knew how to do it, would insert here) and do that.
1. Yourself: tingly
2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend: boyfriend
3. Your hair: brown
4. Your mother: caring
5. Your father: studying
6. Your favorite item: personal-planner/new-hat (totally cheating there - i think these are supposed to be one word answers)
7. Your dream last night: lost a tooth & had lots of family and people from work (sorry, not following the rules at all on it now)
8. Your favorite drink: root-beer
9. Your dream car: hybrid
10. The room you are in: big
11. Your ex: nope (honestly, i don't know what to put here)
12. Your fear: failure
13. What you want to be in 10 years: happy (lame answer, i know, but it's the first that came to mind, i swear)
14. Who you hung out with last night: vikka (high school girl)(ohh, that sounds bad. I swear, I was getting paid for it. Oh, that sounds worse! I swear - I was working)
15. What you're not: brief
16. Muffins: tops (first word thought of)
17: One of your wish list items: laptop
18: Time: 12:40 am
19. The last thing you did: scratch my noise (one word?)
20. What you are wearing: stylish
21. Your favorite weather: sunny
22. Your favorite book: potter
23. The last thing you ate: blt
24. Your life: unexpected
25. Your mood: unexpected
26. Your best friend (s): kt, kt, liz, greer
27. What are you thinking about right now: bed
28. Your car: blue
29. What are you doing at the moment: typing
30. Your summer: new
31. Your relationship status: dating
32. What is on your tv: west-wing
33. What is the weather like: night
34. When is the last time you laughed: panda-sneezing (or rather, watching scott watch the panda sneeze) (i really can't be brief to save my life).
I.) I do think it shows a lot of my obsessive compulsive/way my brain works.
i.) wonder what the need to use lots of slash marks is all about?
B.) I have gone running the past three days (3 miles, 4 miles, 4 miles) and thought up 3 different blogs to write about while running. But at this point, I don't really feel like trying to get all that out of me and onto the "paper".
C.) So I'm going to steal a MeMe (aka, self-indulgent survey) off a friends blog (again, if knew how to do it, would insert here) and do that.
1. Yourself: tingly
2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend: boyfriend
3. Your hair: brown
4. Your mother: caring
5. Your father: studying
6. Your favorite item: personal-planner/new-hat (totally cheating there - i think these are supposed to be one word answers)
7. Your dream last night: lost a tooth & had lots of family and people from work (sorry, not following the rules at all on it now)
8. Your favorite drink: root-beer
9. Your dream car: hybrid
10. The room you are in: big
11. Your ex: nope (honestly, i don't know what to put here)
12. Your fear: failure
13. What you want to be in 10 years: happy (lame answer, i know, but it's the first that came to mind, i swear)
14. Who you hung out with last night: vikka (high school girl)(ohh, that sounds bad. I swear, I was getting paid for it. Oh, that sounds worse! I swear - I was working)
15. What you're not: brief
16. Muffins: tops (first word thought of)
17: One of your wish list items: laptop
18: Time: 12:40 am
19. The last thing you did: scratch my noise (one word?)
20. What you are wearing: stylish
21. Your favorite weather: sunny
22. Your favorite book: potter
23. The last thing you ate: blt
24. Your life: unexpected
25. Your mood: unexpected
26. Your best friend (s): kt, kt, liz, greer
27. What are you thinking about right now: bed
28. Your car: blue
29. What are you doing at the moment: typing
30. Your summer: new
31. Your relationship status: dating
32. What is on your tv: west-wing
33. What is the weather like: night
34. When is the last time you laughed: panda-sneezing (or rather, watching scott watch the panda sneeze) (i really can't be brief to save my life).
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