Past, Future, and The Present

My past life/lives have been coming up with such frequency.

Talking about how I've lived in Vermont during mud season, about leading canoe trips in Canada, having worked at a high school in Michigan - all between my undergrad graduation and starting grad school. All in my "relatively young life" (quotations provided by co-worker). I keep reminding myself of this as I start on yet another path - it occurred to me that in another 4 years, this part of my life - this year of moving back home, this time of first single apartments, of grad school, of living back in Chicago - this all will be a part of my past, a past life, as well. At this time in my old life I would be in the middle of throwing a canoe over my head to carry across rocky terrain while trying to convince kids they could do the same, or singing at the top of my lungs my new favorite pop song to keep spirits up as the group paddled on; was trying to start a fire in the rain, reminding kids to put sunscreen on or drink water while not doing it myself. Where will I be in my future summers?

As referenced above - I will be moving into my first "apartment". I put the quotations around it because I don't want people getting the idea that I have a several rooms joined by hallways and closets that I will fill with furniture. What I have is ONE room with a tiny kitchen, a closet, and a bathroom that are attached to this one room. A little tiny studio - just for me. And that is just fine. After having lived with house mates in Vermont, various reincarnations of The Female Staff Cabin in Canada, sharing a bathroom with high school girls and then an apartment with a roommate that I tolerated and then a building with high school boys, and most recently back with my parents - I am ready for a space that only I can inhabit.

I do dream of the day when I can host dinner parties and have more than four walls to hang things on, but those days are not here yet. With work, school, and the attempt at a social life that takes place outside of the living room, I do not need a large place this year. This next year is simply about starting. Summer of 2007 was about endings. Winter of 2008 was about piecing myself back together. Fall of 2008 will be about starting. I'll worry about wanting more once I get myself to Summer of 2009.

I move into this new place in September. I realized that the last week of August/first week of September will be made up of a lot of components of my next year: I will have my last day at my 2nd job on Tuesday, will go to my first class (which by the way is Management of Library and Information Centers - and I think it's hysterical that it starts before I even take my Intro to Library and Informational Science class the following week). That whole week I will of course be working my main 30 hour a week library gig, and on Thursday my long time friend will come in from out of town and we will road-trip it for the weekend down to Nashville for a wedding. She flies out at 6 am on Monday morning, which is September 1st - the day I move in. So the week includes: work, school, weddings, and my new living space. That's pretty much what my next year will be about, and at this point, I'm pretty excited about that.